It's been more than 20 years since Robert De Niro Sr.'s death from cancer, but his memory is fresh for his son, who has preserved his father's final home and studio in New York City's SoHo. Filled with books, paintbrushes, and hundreds of canvases, some of which he never finished, it looks like pop stepped away for a coffee and should be back to finish another still life before dinner. The loft remains a quiet shrine to an artist that few recognize, perhaps mistaking his figurative paintings for a late Matisse or another French master. "It was the only way to keep his being, his existence alive," De Niro explains. "To me, he was always a great artist."
O4m Like Father Like Son Only Better
It amazes me that SoHo has these hidden spaces that, no matter what, never seem to change.Exactly. And I like things that don't change. I like consistency. Constancy. People look forward to tradition, they come back, it's still there, nothing's changed. Like when you go to a certain restaurant and you go back, and all of sudden it's changed because they hired a new chef. If it's not broke, don't fix it. This space is here, and in 20 years, people won't know what a real space like this will be unless it was in a museum and they recreated it.
After your father's death, did you lock the door and not come back? Or did you take a while before you decided what to do with it?I didn't think of just selling it and dismantling it. Luckily, I could afford to keep it going, so I left it as is. My mother was alive then. I don't remember what we discussed. I documented and went through everything to make sure we catalogued it, and then I said, "I'm keeping it like this."
His older studios, like, a block away, maybe 60 years ago, were not like this. Then it was Siberia -- for real -- on West Broadway or LaGuardia Place. My mother had this place first and then she gave it to my father; they were friends. She came down here a long time ago. She had a place in the Meatpacking District, like, 50 years ago.
When you were younger, it sounded like you had problems connecting with each other.We were not the type of father and son who played baseball together, as you can surmise. But we had a connection. I wasn't with him a lot, because my mother and he were separated and divorced. As I say in the documentary, I looked after him in certain ways.
Is there a piece of your father's that's your favorite?Oh, I have a lot. I have Venice by Night at my house. I love the ones at Locanda Verde, at the grill upstairs on the second floor. There are a lot of black-and-whites that are terrific. I like the delicacy of them, the refinement. They have a certain kind of clarity. They're really great.
If I may return to some of the things you read from the diaries in the documentary, your father said he felt like being an artist was an "affliction," and he thought being gay was a sort of affliction. Do you think he was conflicted about his life's passion?About his homosexuality? Yeah, he probably was, being from that generation, especially from a small town upstate. I was not aware, much, of it. I wish we had spoken about it much more. My mother didn't want to talk about things in general, and you're not interested when you're a certain age. Again, for my kids, I want them to stop and take a moment and realize that you sometimes have to do things now instead of later, because later may be 20 years from now -- and that's too late.
Some of your contemporaries, like Al Pacino, have made films with queer themes. I wonder if your father's sexual orientation may have influenced your choices. Were there projects you didn't want to do because of your dad?No, I didn't... those were just the things I did or wanted to do. I won't speak for Al. He did it because it was a good part at the time. It didn't happen for me.
In the movie, you reveal the fact that your father often felt superior. That sort of ego is something a creative person sometimes needs to survive. Do you think it's rubbed off on you?In some ways, but I like to be around people. He spent a lot of time alone, or with a still life or a model. That was his thing. What I remember him saying was, "People, what they appreciate in art, that's their taste. It's as valid as anything else." On the other hand, he had very high standards. When a certain artist came along -- an obvious one was Warhol -- to his standards, he totally didn't get that. This is a whole other thing. There are people who don't know a bunch about art, but they buy it as an asset that will gain value, like a diamond. They don't necessarily know what good art is. They don't care.
Gay administered most of his harshest punishments on Marvin Jr. According to Marvin's sister, Jeanne, from the age of seven well into his teenage years, Marvin's life consisted of "brutal whippings" since Gay Sr. would strike him for any shortcoming, including putting his hairbrush in the wrong place or coming home from school a minute late.[16][2] Marvin would state later, "living with Father was like living with a king, an all-cruel, changeable, cruel and all-powerful king".[2] He further stated to David Ritz, "if it wasn't for Mother, who was always there to console me and praise me for my singing, I think I would have been one of those child suicides you read about in the papers."[2] Alberta Gay later stated that her husband hated Marvin, as she told David Ritz in 1979:[6]
My husband never wanted Marvin, and he never liked him. He used to say he didn't think he was really his child. I told him that was nonsense. He knew Marvin was his. But for some reason, he didn't love Marvin, and what's worse, he didn't want me to love Marvin either. Marvin wasn't very old before he understood that.
According to Alberta, Gay began to drink heavily in the 1950s, only furthering the friction in his relationship with Marvin and "he never did develop any love for the boy."[20] As a teenager, Marvin Jr. attempted to leave home for good following one big fight by enlisting in the US Air Force; a move which the younger Gay later admitted was a bad idea, as he found himself under superiors who had similar authoritarian leanings as his father.
Around 12:30 pm (PST) on April 1, 1984, Gay Sr. began arguing with Alberta again over the missing insurance letter.[13] After he was heard yelling from downstairs, his son, dressed in his maroon robe, shouted downstairs that if he wanted to talk to his mother, he should do it in person.[33] When Gay Sr. initially refused, Marvin warned him not to enter his room, according to interviews from Alberta, the only witness to the shooting. When he did enter, his son angrily shoved his father into the hallway, then hit him.[33] The fight continued in Marvin's bedroom, where Marvin reportedly struck his father and kicked and punched him severely.[33] Alberta successfully separated the men and convinced Marvin to leave the room.[33]
During his first police interview, Gay Sr. stated that he did not mean to kill his son, but that he had been scared that he would be hurt and only shot him in self-defense.[36] When the police asked him if he loved his son, Gay Sr. softly told them, "Let's say I didn't dislike him."[37] The former minister was promptly charged with first-degree murder for his son's death.[36]
As mentioned above, many parts of your surrogacy journey as a two-dad family will look similarly to journeys with only one sperm source. However, when it comes to egg donor selection, there are a few additional considerations that your clinical care team will help you through. If you both are hoping to be genetic intended fathers, your clinic will probably guide you towards a donor with strong fertility levels, or a proven donor (one who has donated successfully before). As you are each hoping to have at least one healthy, chromosomally normal embryo after your IVF cycle, a donor with a proven history may give you the best chance of success.
Some intended parents choose to use a single sperm source (from Partner A), and to use a familial egg donor from Partner B in order to link both family trees together. This is a wonderful way to grow your family, as long as one partner has a cousin, sister, or other relative who is an appropriate candidate. Learn more about what that egg donor screening would look like here.
Perhaps accidentally, young E.B. learned a thing or two from his father, like how to play the stock market. His father also imparted his love for the water. When his son arrived in Maryland in 1968 to teach, he bought two Bay-front homes in a matter of days, purchases he and his family have never regretted.
On a serious note, Unicef concluded that Dutch children and teens reported eating breakfast with their family on a regular basis. In no other country do children have breakfast with their families as regularly as they do in the Netherlands. Not only is eating breakfast associated with better performance in school and decreased behavioral problems, but eating breakfast daily as a family creates opportune time for family bonding and fostering individual identity and growth. 2ff7e9595c
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